The Indestructibleness of Destructiveness

You are checking fb, who has done something epic in the last 3 seconds? Checking emails. Looking at videos on youtube. Online shopping, or online window shopping at least. Reading up on obscure topics on wiki so you will be prepared for the next deep discussion your get into. Watching series of shows online, just because you can. Perhaps reading fml to make you feel a little better about the random freak accidents of your life. Or blogging, like me. All typical frequent occurrences in the massive cycle of self-destructiveness.

Its clear what to do when the issue lies without you. When its illness,circumstance, out of your hands or perhaps another human creating the distraction or problem. But what do you do when the biggest problem is yourself? Its so much harder to resolve. When you know you have so many things to do that you are spontaneously obtaining stress-induced coronary heart disease and yet you waste time. You are too stressed to be productive. Or your lack of focus due to plausible ADD has kicked in. You feel like you cant help it. Like you are a robot and your controls are being used by some other being. You cant seem to shake these feelings and because of that you are wasting even more time. You may decide an early night is the solution, tomorrow will be better. But your lack of productivity is likely to haunt your dreams. You will only wake up more exhausted and stressed. Leading back into the massive cycle of feeling like you are failing at your own life and the only one to blame is yourself.

So whats the solution? How do you defeat self-destructiveness when clearly destructiveness is built to be indestructible? Is it even possible? I dont know. I am sure it must be. I just havent had the good fortune of running into such as of lately. I think the only option is to just take a stand. Clear your head, meditate or run or something so you can at least start in a good headspace. Then, force yourself into a place or zone that will make you get it done. And just nail it out. Thats the best option. Or at least get on top of it. Then it wont be that black cloud hanging over your head everywhere you go.

The only way to defeat the indestructibleness of destructiveness is to overpower it with the self-determination to be a better person. To make now better than yesterday, or the hours preceding it. It requires a mental decision and the will power to back it up. Make a goal, nothing hefty and impossible, just something little. So you can achieve it and get enough of a boost to go for the next step. So I guess I should stop blogging and get on it, set that little goal and start banging out my massive amounts of study. One hour til work, I can achieve something in that time.

Prepare to be destroyed my inner excessively self-destructive self.