The Last Jihad

I read that series of books the other year and wow. They were page after page depicting possibilites of how the world would come to its great demise. And yet they were compelling. These fictional works matched so closely with real life events that I couldnt help but contemplate it all deeper. Then I got focused on life and some of those words fled my mind and were replaced with trivial matters.

And then there was a flood, and a cyclone, and then an earthquake in NZ and then one in Japan. And it started coming back. I really do feel like these are just further signs of the coming demise of the world. I would be lying if I said I wasnt scared. I am terrified. The first time I ever thought of the world ending was 9/11. I remember coming home from school that day and talking to my mum, she was saving all of the articles from the paper and she told me that the world would never be the same after that. I was confused as most 13 year olds would be and suddenly became terrified of further terrorist attacks. I didnt realize that I lived in a rather safe place that would not likely be attacked anytime soon. As the years passed I noticed major changes in the world and the increase in war and destruction. As the natural disasters started appearing everywhere I took it as another sign.

Time slowed enough for me to stop and actually process things. Then I think I started to piece it together. Being religious I had studied about events of the last days and I could see that more and more was happening in the world as signs of the last days. But that wasnt the part that scared me. The only thing I was really worried about was if I would have enough time to raise a family, and what it would be like for my children in the world. I guess I saw for a moment what matters most to me. Its not about what grades I get at uni, or about where I work, or what country I live in. Its about families. I used to know that. I used to place the family on a pedestal but then one day I watched that pedestal shatter and instead of rebuilding it I let its shattered remains cut me. So even though the thoughts of the world ending and the last days being here scare me, in a way, I can find comfort. I am comforted because I dont think its happening tomorrow, or next week or even in a few years. I just know its coming. Comfort in realizing that deep down I still believe in love and families. There is always hope, even if its just a shard. Sometimes you just have to look really hard to find that shard. I found mine.