Cause You Gave Me The Best Mixtape I Have

Warning. This may be sappy. Vomit now.

I dont even know who I am. There are moments when I feel so in love it freaks me out and I just want someone to punch me in the face.I was given a mix cd many years ago. I listened to it as I do and that was that. Somehow over the years it keeps coming back. For example, a year ago I woke up in a rural Australian town with a song stuck in my head. And by song I mean two lines. I had no idea how this happened or what it was but I was obsessed with it all day til I found out it was All At Once by Valencia. I then had to sort out how I knew it and why it was so familiarly vague. Eventually, I sorted out that it was from this mix cd from many years back.

Then it was wedding weekend and I found myself searching for this particular cd. Probably because it is labelled "Will You" and the first song is entitled Marry Me. So I spent the weekend with this album on repeat and I dont know if that did it, or if it was because of the wedding or if it was just me. But it feels like we were meant to be from the beginning I just couldn't see it. I wonder if you knew. I like to think we are together because of me. Because on the first day of this year I decided we were going to be and then proceeded to ask you out and text you while you were away til you realized it. So I like to think it was me that realized it but I dont think it was. It just took me awhile to see what you saw all along.

You gave me the best Mixtape I have, and even all the sad songs ain't so sad.

I am pretty sure we couldnt be more perfect for each other. You make me mental some days. And I need that. I cant handle everything being too perfect or sappy. I need the disagreeing about irrelevant things and the sarcasm. I am so in love I dont know what has happened to who I knew I was. I have become someone I never understood and for once I think it might be the right thing.