When Sorrow Hits A Close Home

I dont think it happens often in life when we feel so much sorrow for someone we wonder how they are surviving. But it has been fourteen hours and I cannot stop the tears still. My heart is broken for you. There are few people in my life that I have loved and laughed with like you and I cannot even come to imagine your pain.

I understand there is a plan. That somehow before we were on earth you chose this, you chose that beautiful girl. And yet I cant not feel sad for you. I cant not worry about you. And it all makes me feel so selfish. I get so stressed about things that are so irrelevant and then something like this happens and I am reminded.

It doesnt compare at all. The closest loss I have had was a baby sister. Paige. She was almost 9 months when she was taken back to heaven and oh did I cry. She was beautiful. And I miss her so much. So I can only start to understand how you feel and that just makes the tears pour. It is probably good that I see so few people at work, I am a wreck.

In 6 weeks I get to see you. And I will take you to a concert and love you and try and be strong for you. But you are the strongest person. And you have a man that will be strong for you too. So for now, for today when it hurts and for all of the other days when it will hurt I hope you know that I love you. That I have looked up to you since you used to lay on my floor reading texts crazily as I stared in confusion, and since you tried to make me like High School Musical. I hope you know that you are never alone and that the Lord will provide you with comfort and that it will get better. You have changed so many lives already and I know you are going to continue to do so and that this experience will somehow make you even stronger. You are blessed and it doesnt make sense to me now but I know she needed you and you needed her. I love you. You are never alone.